Sasha Fierce is a dumb b**** - I Am... Sasha Fierce Album Review

Beyoncé’s new album leaked a couple days ago, as I mentioned, but caught up in all the election greatness as I was, I’m just getting a chance to listen. The way the songs were transferred to my iTunes, I listened to disc two first. That was a mistake. I’m going to go ahead and say that the second disc, as a whole, is garbage. Straight-up rubbish. The lyrics are inane, the beats uninspiring, and it’s hard to believe that this is the best that Beyoncé, the biggest woman in the game, can produce. This could only be the work of that dumb bitch, Sasha.

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The disc starts with Single Ladies. The song has definitely grown on me, but it’s one of those Beyoncé songs that I don’t really care to like. It’s like, this song is kinda stupid, but damn this beat is catchy, and she keeps saying “Single ladies” and “Put a ring on it!” and “Whoa-oh-oh” and yeah, I’m kinda feeling it now, play it again please. Radio, on the other hand, is a Beyoncé song I do care to like. It’s different and a step out of her comfort zone, but you can tell she still had fun recording the track. It’s easily my favorite song on the second disc.

Moving along into the muck that is the remainder of the disc. Diva is so wiggity-whack. Why is she rapping? On this whack a** beat? Moreover, since when is Beyoncé cocky? Oh, right. It’s that dumb bitch Sasha. Sweet Dreams, better known as Beautiful Nightmare, leaked quite some time ago and it’s pretty much the same track. It’s not awful, but it’s not exactly proof that Beyoncé can be successful pushing the envelope and experimenting with different sounds either. She reportedly recorded some 70 songs for this album and I won’t be convinced that there isn’t a track that better deserved a spot on the album.

And the last track on the disc (thank you, sweet Jesus) is Video Phone. Video Phone sounds an awful lot like the track Stupid from Raven-Symoné’s latest album. Except not as good. Now, when Raven is rocking a style harder than Beyoncé, something is wrong. Honestly, Beyoncé’s song should have been called 'Stupid,' because that’s how she sounds. The lyrics are mind-numbing, and it becomes crystal clear that Sasha belongs on the stage and not in the studio. If that’s what you have to call yourself to get in the zone and rock a performance, so be it. But keep that mess to yourself.

So just when I’m ready to write the album off and the disappointment starts to sink in, I start the album from the beginning. And talk about a 180 degree roundabout. Disc one is awesome. It’s the album I was hoping she’d put out. I’ve listened to each track a few times a piece now, and I’ve never been more impressed with her artistry. It’s just sad that it’s tainted by Sasha Fierce’s input.

If I Were a Boy is the album opener, and it really is a great song. I’m surprised she didn’t have a hand in writing the track, but she sounds great on it. An emotive Beyoncé is an engaging Beyoncé. Halo is super dramatic, but in a good way. Beyoncé never gets drowned out by the big instrumentation and she doesn’t even yell. By the end, you’re bopping your head and wondering why it’s over. Disappear is one of those pretty songs you can leave on repeat. Beyoncé rides the soft beat expertly and you start to see the potential greatness of Beyoncé, stripped down, accompanied with a guitar and nothing else, doing a set and shutting it down.

Broken-hearted Girl succeeds more on the merit of its instrumentation rather than its lyrics. The song builds really nicely, and we already know Beyoncé can lace a midtempo but she shows just the right amount of restraint. Ave Maria and Satellites have much the same feel. Both songs showcase Beyoncé’s vocals and she delivers. Satellites in particular is very pretty. Both are very chill and you’re lulled into this nice, relaxing place until Single Ladies rudely interrupts and you remember who you’re listening to.

Overall, I have to say I’m proud of B. This is the material I’m excited to see her perform. This is the next step Beyoncé needed to take to stay on top. It’s still Beyoncé, but it’s a reinvention. She’s vulnerable and you get a sense that the songs actually mean something to her. We really could have done without Sasha’s contributions, though. That dumb bitch really ruined a good thing.

I’m very curious as to how this album will be received by her fans. I think we all expected Sasha’s tracks to knock, but they don’t even manage to accomplish that. And the first disc is such a departure from her usual sound. Let me know what you guys think.